You stupid mutt!
by Demented Insane Spirit
Summary: Because of Jou, the YGO gang are being thrown into different TV Shows! Will they ever escape Jou’s stupidity or the animated and real shows? Only Kaiba can get them back to their world!
1. That 70's Show

Title: "You stupid mutt!" 

_Rating: M_

_Genre: Humor_

_Summary: Because of Jou, the YGO gang are being thrown into different TV Shows! Will they ever escape Jou's stupidity or the animated and real shows? Only Kaiba can get them back to their world!_

_Disclaimer: I don't own YuGiOh, nor That 70's Show or any other TV Show._

_Notes/Warnings: Well, this isn't meant as a bashing towards Jou, but I could think of no other title and only he could mess up one of Kaiba's inventions...So...Yeah. _

_Couples: None!_

X

The YGO gang were sitting in front of the TV, watching _That 70's Show_.

"You know, none of these people are attractive," Mai remarked.

"Yeah, like Kelso...He's really not that pretty," Yuugi commented. They blinked and looked over at him.

"Jackie's hot," Malik said, "but really annoying. I'd like to shoot her in the head."

"You all are idiots. I don't know why I came," Kaiba muttered.

"Then you shouldn't have come, asshole."

"Who are _you_ calling an asshole, Ishtar?" The CEO growled.

"Why, I think I'm calling _you_ an asshole! – ASSHOLE."

"Bastard!"

"Jackass!"

"Fuck-face." Malik smirked then.

"You shouldn't talk about yourself, Kaiba, people might stop liking you."

"Whoever said anyone liked me in the first place?"

"And you're _proud_ of that?"

"Quite a bit."

"Whoever said anyone _didn't_ like you?" Anzu asked, gazing across at the CEO.

(OO)

"Are you hitting on me?" Kaiba asked, looking uncomfortable.

"(-.-) In your dreams," she grumbled, turning back to the TV.

"More like in yours," he muttered, giving her a dark look, turning back to the contraption he was messing with.

"Ooh, what's dat?" Jou suddenly asked, peering over Kaiba's shoulder. "I wanna see!"

"Get away from me, you homo!" Kaiba snapped, jerking the thing away from him. Jou growled and pounced on him, shoving his hand against it.

BEEP!

X

"(o.o) This can't be good..." Bakura muttered to himself, seeing the people from _That 70's Show_ staring down at them. "...This _really_ can't be good."

"LOOK WHAT YOU DID, YOU IDIOTIC MUTT! I SHOULD CASTRATE YOU!" Kaiba started to strangle Jou, swearing in all the languages he knew.

"Kaiba, he doesn't look so good..." Ryou began a bit uncertainly. "Chap, he's turning purple." Pause. "He's turning blue." Pause. "Kaiba, you're killing him!"

"Man," Hyde said suddenly, "this is the government's doing." Red, however, could see clearly that the YGO gang were Japanese and that made him skeptical.

"It's those damn Japanese! They just can't accept defeat anymore!" Red burst out.

"Well...We could never accept defeat either, so that might be our problem," Erik commented smartly.

"And your problem is going to be my foot in your ass," his father snapped with a crooked grin.

"...All right then."

"(OO) Wow..." Malik stared up at them, dazed. "I think we're in the TV." He stood up, turned and ran towards the...well, where the camera is supposed to be and jumped only to crash into the sidewalk.

"Hey there! Hi there! Ho there!" Bob and Midge arrived, both grinning. "Wow, Red, you got some nifty little robots here."

"Robots...?" Marik, Bakura, and Yami repeated in outrage. "WHAT THE HELL IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?"

"Hey," Red turned to the three, "shut up, you Japanese."

"They look more...Arabic." Kitty corrected her husband.

"_No_," Kelso suddenly looked excited. "Oh man, I know who they are! They're the aliens!"

"Kelso – shut up about the aliens!" Hyde snapped at him.

"Yeah," Jackie piped up. "There is _no such thing_ as aliens. When are you going to understand that? You're a cop for God sakes!"

"_AH!_" He glared at them. "Well, I'll take my theories elsewhere!" He turned to Fez. "I know who they are, they're the _aliens_."

"I think they are from my country, those three." Fez said, nodding.

"...Where _are_ you from, Fez?"

"That is a very personal question to be asking, Kelso."

"So, hey," Erik spoke to Marik, "where's Bugs Bunny?"

(oO)

"Dear Ra, I think he's coming on to me," Marik whispered to Bakura and Yami. Both nodded, looking at Erik in horror.

"You know...What's up doc?"

"Affirmative," Bakura concluded, backing away.

"Uh, Kaiba, that doesn't look like a good thing to do right now..." Yami said uncertainly, spotting Kaiba sprawled over Anzu, who looked unconscious.

"...Shut up, Yami, just shut up."

"See, they even have Japanese names!" Red pointed out.

"You are _racist_!" Yuugi declared, bouncing up and down in front of Red. "You don't like us because we're different and that scares you! Well, listen, there isn't anything to be afraid of, buddy! Just because we're not the same color as you or from the same country as you, it doesn't mean you have to be afraid." Yuugi then took Red's hand. "It's okay now. We're your friends."

"What the _hell_ is this little midget's problem!" Red demanded, jerking his hand from Yuugi's.

"You need to understand that he's working out some issues," Marik told him with a bored expression.

"All right," Bob turned to his daughter abruptly. "What did you do, Donna? Are you dating a cartoon?"

"_Dad_! You know I'm dating Erik!"

"_Speaking_ of him," Marik spoke up again, "how the hell can you love a fucking stick? Look at him! He's as weak as a Ra-damn baby!"

"That's very true," Mai asserted. "I wouldn't even _touch_ a guy like him. I mean, _who_ would even like him? Honestly!"

"You're mean!" Shizuka told Mai.

"You have a squeaky voice, but _I_ never said anything," the blonde told her. Shizuka started to cry then.

"Aww, poor Shizuka..." Ryou said.

Silence.

"Well?" Bakura demanded.

"Well what? I said what I wanted to and I'm satisfied, chap."

"Stop saying chap, you idiot abiou of mine!"

"Abiou?" The other non-animated people said.

"Well, there you have it." Red affirmed. "They're talking Japanese too."

"_Konnichiwa_," Yuugi greeted. "_Red-sama._"

"...I told you."

"See, man, it's the government's doing!" Hyde told them all.

"Well, honey, why don't you just...put them in the basement for awhile?" Kitty suggested to Erik. Erik just stared at her.

"...Yes, mom..."

X

There was silence in the basement as the 70's gang sat on the couch and chairs, while the YGO gang stood behind them, looking at each other awkwardly.

"...Damn," Kaiba swore, glaring at his cell phone. "This thing is a piece of shit!"

"Before you completely ruin that," Ryou spoke up as Kaiba raised his arm, "I just thought you should know that cell phones weren't even invented until...Oh, I dunno 2000?"

"Ha, ha," Erik gave a fake laugh, "you're funny. This world will probably be blown up from Darth Vader."

"Erik," Kelso turned to him, "will you shut up about Star Wars all ready?"

"(-.-) Yeah, seriously," Bakura muttered, then imitated Erik: "Ooh, I'm a skinny fag who likes Star Wars, Star Wars, Star Wars! I'm so obsessed! So, so, so, obsessed!"

(silence)

"I think you're getting meaner, yami," Ryou muttered.

"You think so?"

"Well..." the other glanced at Erik, who not only looked like he was going to cry, but was going to have fit. Either that, or he was planning on pissing his pants. "Yeah."

"Hmm, I don't think so. Not really."

"(U.U) Er...okay then, yami."

"You know what I wanna know?" Jackie spoke up. "I wanna know how it is that these cartoon men – except for the spiky haired guys – are so hot and our men – actual humans – aren't!"

"I dunno," Donna said slowly, "the spiky-haired men are pretty sexy."

"Yeah, and you have bad tastes in men."

"Amen!" Kelso, Fez, and Hyde piped up.

"Shut up!" Erik told them.

"You know what?" Marik leaned over on the screen and took out a pen and peered down at the subtitles, before adding an 'a' to 'Erik'. "Your name is now Erika."

"That's not fair!" Erika whined. "Aww, why does it say Erika on the subtitles!"

"Because you act like a little girl, why else?" Hyde asked, rolling his eyes.

"...How did you do that?" Anzu asked Marik, blinking.

"You mean changed the subtitles? I just went to that TV– " points to TV " – and wrote an 'a' after 'Erik'."

"...You're so dumb," Malik muttered to himself, shaking his head.

"Hey, anyone want to smoke a bag?" Kelso asked suddenly.

"I guess going back can wait."

(Later)

"Dude, there's this car...and it runs on water, man!" Hyde told them.

"Man, will you shut up about that car?" Kelso asked, looking critically at Hyde. "You wanna know something interesting? I went to the mall...and I bought some shoes...And they're cool."

"That's great, man."

"I know a guy that collects shoes," Yami told them, looking stupidly thoughtful. "But I got in a fight with him and he started to collect dirt instead."

"...That is so awesome."

"Erik, honey," Kitty called from upstairs, "bring your friends upstairs, it's time for dinner!"

X

Lorie glanced at the guys of the YGO gang, interested. "I've never had sex with a cartoon before," she whispered in Yami's ear. He blinked and scooted away from her, wide-eyed.

"She scares me, Yuugi," Yami whispered to him, swallowing his meat.

"Yeah, well..." Yuugi shrugged.

"So," Red spoke up with a frown, "what's wrong with you Japanese?"

"(o.o) There's nothing wrong with us," Anzu said.

"Oh yeah? Well, let me tell you something, sweetheart, when I was at war – "

"Blah, blah, blah – who really gives a damn?" Marik grumbled, poking the food. "Is this edible?"

"Well!" Kitty smiled. "This sure is a lively dinner tonight, huh, Red?"

"Oh yeah, lively. It's going to be even more lively when my foot talks with their _ass_."

"Is he threatening us?" Bakura asked Marik, who nodded.

"I think he is."

"No one threatens _this _tomb robber and gets away with it!"

"Whatcha doin, Kaiba?" Jou asked, peering at the object that had got them in the show.

"You stay the hell away from me, Jounouchi," Kaiba growled warningly. "I don't need you breaking this when it's just about finished."

"Ooh, what does dat button doooo?" Jou reached out to push it, but Kaiba bit his hand. "YOW! What da hell was dat for, Kaiba?" Jou sniffled, sucking on the bite wound Kaiba made.

"I said to stay away from me, you damn poodle!" the CEO snapped. "And that hand had better have been washed!" Jou merely gave a whine in response like a dog. "Humph."

"...knives, I like knives better," Bakura was telling Marik.

"Nah, guns are better."

"No, knives are."

"Guns are."

"Knives."

"Guns."

"Knives."

"Guns!"

"KNIVES, DAMN YOU!"

"(o.o) They're still arguing about how to kill Red, huh?" Mai asked Anzu, who nodded.

"Kind of a...Petty argument."

"I WANNA TOUCH IT!" Jou lunged at Kaiba.

"JOUNOUCHI!"

BEEP!

Silence.

"Oh, hell," Kaiba muttered, staring at Scooby-Doo and Shaggy. "This is just bull shit..."

Will the YGO gang suddenly start seeking out ghosts? Will they ever return to their world? Is Jou ever going to become smart? Find out on the next chapter of "You stupid mutt!"

X

DIS: (sweat drop) I shouldn't be starting a new fic, but...I can't help it. This was supposed to be a one-shot with just 'That 70's Show', but when I altered the ending...(o.o) Yeah. I wouldn't expect many updates, since this is just a fun little thing I'm doing and I have to find more and more shows (which shouldn't be hard). Anyway, please review and ideas are always appreciated! Adieu!


	2. Scooby Doo and Spongebob

DIS: (-.-) Ooh, I'm so exhausted...And I look like crap. But, even so, I want to make this chapter! So-oo...Thank you, Everto Angelus (yes, that's a great idea!), King Sephiroth, Atemu's Lover, Marin M, Chained and Torchered, Velvet-Vampire (lol, I think those were my favorite parts as well), monkeyluv4646, Kitsunegirl4ever, Darkloverfan, Moon'sHope, and Midnight Chamber for reviewing! (sniffs) I feel so happy that you all reviewed, you have no idea...

Marik: (-.-)

DIS: It even makes me get over my depression of being tired and having a horrible sunburn and knowing that La Crimson Wave is coming! (snuffle) I hate being female.

Marik: I hate you in general...(mutter)

DIS: Oh yeah...I HAVE AN ANNOUNCEMENT! My new favorite character is the adored SETO KAIBA! (hugs picture of Kaiba)

Marik: (O.O'') WHAT!

Kaiba: (o.o) Someone save me...

DIS: YEAH! He rules!

Bakura and Marik: That arrogant bastard!

DIS: Yeah, yeah...I still love you guys, but I have a real obsession with Kaiba now. He's so tall, cold, arrogant, intelligent, _and sane_...

Marik: Oh, well excuse _us_!

DIS: AND SEXAH!

Kaiba: (smirks)

Marik: (-.-)

DIS: Now on to the chapter! (With extra Kaiba-ness!)

X

(Recap!)

Because of Jou, everyone was thrown into the TV show, That 70's Show and had to deal with Erika's stupidity, Red's jackass-ness and the fact that they're cartoons in a real world! But when Kaiba is nearly finished with his contraption that got them in there, Jou pushed the button yet again and they were tossed into the cartoon of Scooby-Doo! Will the YGO gang suddenly start seeking out ghosts? Will they ever return to their world? Is Jou ever going to become smart? It's time to find out on the second chapter of, "You stupid mutt!" (Title made by Seto Kaiba)

X

Chapter Two, Scooby-Doo and Spongebob 

"Oh, hell," Kaiba muttered, staring at Scooby-Doo and Shaggy. "This is just bull shit..." Shaggy blinked slowly, as though surprised.

"LIKE, YIKES! MONSTERS!" Shaggy suddenly shouted, pointing at Marik's hair. The blonde glared at him, reaching for his Millennium Rod.

_How dare he insult my hair! It took more than two hours to get it this way! How dare he! I'll show that skinny, wanna-be man who's the better one here!_ He thought mutinously. He grinned, grasping the M. Rod, but –

BOP BOP BOP BOP BOP BOP BOP

(OO)

"Yuugi!" Yami gasped, looking at Marik, who had swirls for eyes. "You knocked Marik out...I'm so proud!" The Pharaoh took out a handkerchief and dabbed his eyes, sniffing. "This is such a proud day for you, I want to...Um..." He blinked as Yuugi put a collar around Marik's neck and then clipped a leash on it.

"Bad dog," Yuugi scolded Marik, wagging his finger at him. Kaiba looked at Jou murderously, a dark smirk coming onto his features, devious thoughts coming to his head.

"(OO) Uh oh," Jou gulped. "Dis can't be good...Er, Kaiba...Erm...I love you?"

"BWAHAHAHA! HOW'S IT FEEL TO BE ON THE BAD END, JOUNOUCHI?" Kaiba asked, cackling. Bakura and Malik's eyes popped wide open and they slowly inched away from the CEO, hiding behind Anzu, who was standing around idly. Scooby jumped into Shaggy's arms, both shivering.

"Shaggy, Scooby, there you are!" Daphne (is that the right spelling?) called. Her, Fred, and Velma ran to them and Fred blinked, looking from the YGO gang, to Shaggy and Scooby.

"Hey..." He blinked once again. "Why do they have better animation than we do?"

"Fred..." Velma sighed. "That is irrelevant to the reason of how the people before us found out that the world was round. To measure it, you would go 3.859258 plus 1.93485. Now, then – "

"What the hell is she talking about?" Bakura asked Anzu, poking her shoulder.

"I think she's trying to say that Fred is a dumbass and that she wants to prove him of it," Malik replied for Anzu.

"Hey, jackass," Bakura glared at him, "was I talking to you?"

"No, but she wasn't planning on answering, were you?" Malik asked Anzu.

"(o.o)...I don't feel comfortable with my back bared to you guys," she told them. Both blinked and stood in front of her. "Much better! Oh, and Malik's right."

"See?" Malik sneered with an arrogant look.

"Want me to shove my foot up your ass?" Bakura demanded.

"(oO) I think Red is rubbing off on you, Bakura," Anzu told him. He seemed to consider this, then sighed in depression, hanging his head.

"Damn that redneck."

(X.X)

"Okay," Fred said, clicking his tongue and making a feminine gesture with his hand, "I don't know _what_ you said, Velma, but okay, I agree with you."

"You're such a dumbass, Fred," Velma said, rolling her eyes. "God, what, were you born in a fucking barn? COME ON, IT'S NOT THAT HARD, STUPID!"

(OO)

"Velma's gone through puberty," Fred whispered to Daphne, "don't worry about it."

"WHAT?" Velma roared. "LISTEN, ASSHOLE, I WENT THROUGH PUBERTY A LONG TIME AGO! WANT ME TO WEAR TIGHT CLOTHES LIKE HER? WELL, SUCK ON THIS!" And at that, she gave him the finger, storming off. Everyone just sort of...Stared after her.

"Must be that time of the month," Mai remarked.

"Like, what's that supposed to mean?" Shaggy asked, blinking.

"Oh, Shaggy," Fred sighed, patting him on the shoulder, "you have so much to learn."

"(U.U) Er..."

"Come on, Daphne and I are going to search for clues. Let's see, some of you can come with us and what's left can go with Shaggy and Scooby. All right, gang, let's move out!" Jou, Shizuka, Honda, Otogi, Ryou, and Mai left with Fred and Daphne. The others (Marik, Yuugi, Bakura, Anzu, Malik, Yami, and Kaiba) went with Shaggy and Scooby.

Silence...

"You two are stupid," Kaiba muttered to Malik and Bakura, who, once again, were hiding behind Anzu.

"Yeah, well you're _psychotic_!" Malik told him, clutching onto one of Anzu's arms. "Don't let him get me!"

"(X.X) You two are so immature," she said, shoving them towards Kaiba. Malik scrambled away from him, but Bakura just kind of...stared at Kaiba.

"Do you have something to say to me, Tomb Robber?"

"...I might."

"(oO)"

"..."

Once again, silence.

"Okay," Bakura nodded, rubbing his chin. "Let's see...All right, okay." He turned back to Kaiba and clapped his hands once, looking up at the sky thoughtfully. "Okay."

And again, silence.

"WELL?" Kaiba snapped at last.

"I'M THINKING, ALL RIGHT! GIVE ME A MINUTE!"

(A minute passes)

"Okay, I got it," Bakura said, turning back to Kaiba.

"(-.-) Oh gee, this is going to be good," the taller male said sarcastically.

"You're ugly," Bakura told him.

"Bakura..." Malik sighed, shaking his head.

"Hey, at least I don't sleep with men," Kaiba told him with a shrug.

"WHAT!" He paused. "How is that true when just yesterday I was in Anzu's bed?"

(0o0'')

"ANZU!" Yami gasped, looking tearful. "How could you betray me like this?"

"(X.X) Yami, he's _lying_," Anzu told him, her cheeks going red from the extra attention. "BAKURA, DON'T USE ME IN YOUR BATTLES!"

"(o.o) But...you're the least annoying and least sluttiest...And the prettiest."

"Aww," she blushed. "You're so sweet!"

_Works every time,_ Bakura thought, turning back to Kaiba, who just glared at him. "(o.o) What?"

"I'll break every bone in your body if you sleep with her," he hissed so only Bakura could hear.

"(OO') Okay," the latter hastily replied.

"Hey, are we going to look for clues?" Scooby asked. (I don't know what letters he does the 'r' sound on, so...Yeah)

"Like, yeah, clues for food!" Shaggy told his companion, putting his hand to his stomach. "I'm starving!"

"(-.-) Aren't you always?" Kaiba muttered. "He's like that stupid mutt..."

"Psst," Bakura nudged him, "I know you wanna screw Mazaki."

"I know you wanna screw Isis, but I never say anything."

"(0o0)..._how did you find that out, Kaiba?_"

"Oh, I dunno..." Kaiba examined his hand casually. "The fact that you have a drawer full of pictures of her taking a shower or half nude?"

"(OO) You trespassed without my permission!"

"Actually," he grinned, "I had Ryou's permission."

_RYOU!..._

X

Ryou flinched, feeling a heavy foreboding come over him, as though danger approached. _I always feel this when Bakura is angry at me. (T.T) Oh great, what did I do now? _

" – yeah, but Fred, why would it be 1.93485 when it could be 1.93486 or 1.93487 or – "

"I forgot how annoying Daphne is," Mai muttered. "No wonder I hate redheads."

"Hey, are we dere yet?" Jou asked Fred.

"We're not really going anywhere, we're looking for clues."

(Five minutes later)

"I found a clue!" Jou announced. Fred and the others went to where Jou was bending down. The two blondes stared at the mold on the leaf.

"Wow," Fred whispered, "it's some kind of...chemical. It's changed the balance of the leaf...I wonder what it is?"

"Me too." Both stared at the leaf in awe. "Should we touch it?"

"We might become ugly and _I_ certainly am not going to become not pretty." So they returned to staring at it.

"(-.-) What morons..." Mai sighed, rolling her eyes.

X

"Ungh...?" Marik blinked, waking up, smelling burning. "Mm, that smells good...Wait a minute...(OO) WAUGH!" He yelped, jumping up.

YANK

"(X.X) GACK," he started to cough, clawing at his neck and running in circles. Yuugi continued to yank him back towards him with the leash.

"Bad!" Yuugi threw a bucket of water at Marik's rear and he whimpered, putting his hands to his butt, seething inside. Bakura snickered at the male's appearance.

"Have an accident there, Marik?" He asked the other, grinning.

"Don't make me hurt you, Bakura."

BOOOO!

"(OO) AWWW!" Yami yowled, running from the huge ghostly figure. Shaggy and Scooby went, "YIKES!" and followed Yami. 70's music started, which made Bakura pause in his own running and put his hands on his hips and stare at the band. They stopped playing and blinked, swallowing. He grinned and Malik and Marik paused as well. The three attacked the band members, slamming their guitars and drums onto them.

"BWAHAHA, KING OF THE JUNGLE!" Marik cackled, his leash hanging from his neck.

"BOO!" The figure yelled at them.

"(OO) EEK!" The three started hauling ass at that.

X

"Hold on, gang!" Fred put his hand out and turned his head side from side, then put his ear to the ground, listening carefully. "Do you hear that, Jounouchi?" Jou also put his ear to the ground, listening as well.

"Wow, dat sounds loud!" He exclaimed. Shizuka and Mai blinked, glanced at each other, than looked at the two again. "It sounds almost like...Footsteps."

"You're right!" Fred agreed, furrowing his brows.

"GET OUT OF THE WAY!" Yami shouted all of a sudden.

"The ground talks!" Both Fred and Jou gasped before everyone ran over them.

"What - ?" Ryou watched the others run, then looked to the figure. "AWWW!" He and everyone else ran – right over Fred and Jou. For a long time, the wounded blondes sat their, twitching.

"This could be a problem," Fred muttered.

"What's dat?"

"I can't feel my manhood..."

"Oh, I've had dat problem for five years now."

"(o.o'')"

X

"Hurry up, Kaiba," Anzu ordered him.

"I'm trying, you stupid female," he snapped back, hurriedly attempting to fix his contraption. "Ah!" He grinned, then Jou came crashing through.

"GHOST!" He yowled, flinging himself forward.

"NO, YOU STUPID MUTT!" Kaiba roared, blending in with Anzu's anguished cry. A white flash came and Jou squealed.

X

Blub, blub...

"Why do we have a fish tank over our heads?" Yami asked, blinking. The others also blinked and looked around.

_(o.o) I feel a premonition upon us..._ Bakura thought to himself, glancing around, before he grabbed Ryou and put him in front of him as a shield. _(O.O) Bad omen, _he thought when he heard squeaking noises.

Squeak, squeak, squeak...squeak.

Then, following that, was an annoying, high-pitched laugh that seemed to go on forever...

(OO)

(In time...)

...and ever and ever...

(oO'')

"Wow, look Patrick!" Spongebob exclaimed, pointing at the YGO gang. "It's...um...I'm not sure what it is."

"(OO) What the - ! I DEMAND AN EXPLANATION, FOR I AM PHARAOH!" Yami commanded, trying to look superior.

Silence.

Spongebob blinked, then Patrick scratched his rear. More silence came and Kaiba frowned, looking at his contraption. Did it shrink them too, or what?

"Kaiba, I don't like this show," Anzu muttered to him, she and Mai glaring.

"Yeah? It's not as though I like it that much either, all right?" He scowled, looking at the metal thing.

"So..." Spongebob glanced around. "Nice weather we're having."

"(oO)..." Shizuka looked around her thoughtfully. "Yeah, nice," she agreed, then smiled and winked at Patrick. The star blinked once, then blushed, looking bashful.

(-.-)

_I'm gonna kill him..._ Jou thought to himself, glowering at Patrick, whose eyes were glued on Shizuka, who was blushing as well.

_They disgust me, _Kaiba thought to himself, wrinkling his nose.

"Where ya from?" Spongebob asked Yuugi.

(What the YGO gang hear...)

"Well, we're from Domino, Japan. Recently we were in Scooby-Doo Land and That 70's Show Land, though. I think we're in the TV, but..."

(What Patrick and Spongebob hear)

"I think I'm from an egg. I look just like you, Spongebob, did you know that? It's a shock, isn't it? I mean..."

"Somehow," Honda muttered, "I have the feeling that they're not getting what Yuugi's saying." Otogi nodded in agreement, his brows brought down, apparently disturbed.

"All right..." Kaiba murmured to Anzu, fixing his metal machine. "Now if – "

"Oh, hey!" Patrick ran over to Kaiba and snatched the machine. "What does this button do?"

"DON'T – " Both Anzu and Kaiba began, but it was too late.

X

"Why do I have the feeling we're in a horrible animated show?" Mai asked, looking around.

"Because a frickin' Pokémon is staring at us," Honda replied hotly, glaring at the Pokémon.

"...Damn," near to everyone muttered.

X

DIS: I've always wanted to put the YuGiOh characters in the Pokémon world. After this next chapter, I'll do either Inuyasha, Jimmy Neutron, or House of Mouse (a Mickey Mouse one, pretty much.) So, please review, ideas are welcome, and have a good night! (looks at clock) aii, I need to finish my math homework!


	3. Pokemon and Inuyasha

DIS: Welcome, everyone, back to 'You stupid mutt!' Here is where I remind you that this is just a random, fun fic that I just put up, so updates will be...slow...depending on the inspiration I get. And I couldn't remember any Pokémon, either, so...Yeah, that was a problem for awhile. I sincerely hope for this to be a long chapter, but ya never know. Thanks to Everto Angelus, Marin M, Kitsunegirl4ever, a-man-duh2004, Princess of Thieves, Moon'sHope, monkeyluv4646, merick'sgirl, DangerousandDemonicDevil, Velvet-Vampire, and Erika Darkmoon. The majority of you wanted Inuyasha, so Inuyasha it shall be!

X

_Chapter Three, Pokémon and Inuyasha_

(Warning! I stopped watching this show a long time ago, so if the Pokémon names are misspelled, if _anything_ is wrong it's probably my own fault.)

A Bulbasaur (I'm not sure how to spell ANY of the Pokèmon names...) was staring at them, blinking slowly. Mai stared over at the Pokémon with wide eyes. "Ew..." Mai gave a look of disgust. "What _is_ that thing?"

Jou dug in his pocket and brought out his Pokedex or whatever it's called... "Bulbasaur," and from there it listed it's attacks and what it involved to. They glanced at each other, then stared at Jou, who was listening to the Pokedex, before he shut it and put it in his pocket.

"Katsuya..." Kaiba growled, "where the hell did you get that?" Jou blinked.

"Huh? Get what?" Kaiba clenched his jaw tight, grinding his teeth, glowering at the blonde.

"That red Poke-fucking-dex..."

"(o.o) Huh?"

SMASH!

"OW! WHAB BA HELL WA DAT FOR, KAIBA!" Jou shouted, holding onto his nose. Kaiba glared down at him, one of his hands balled into a fist.

"_Next_ time, DON'T PLAY STUPID! Now give me the damn Pokedex!"

"(OO) I bon't bo whab your balkin' about, Kaiba," Jou told him, holding his nose still.

"(-.-) Shut up, already. You're sounding stupider than usual."

"Well, well, what's dis, I wonder?" They turned to see _another_ Pokémon named Meowth (I think that's his name.) "(o.o) You's guys got better animation than us here in Pokémon do. I'm impressed!"

"Of course we do," Honda spoke up, bragging. "Kazuki Takahashi made us – _duh_!" Meowth blinked.

"Who's that?"

(anime fall)

"ONE OF THE BEST MANGA ARTIST'S EVER, FOOL!" Honda snapped at him.

"(oO) I think he's overreacting just a _little_ bit," Anzu remarked. Kaiba frowned as Honda clenched his fists tightly, looking irritated.

"Since when were we made by some manga artist?" He asked. Anzu slowly turned her head to him and blinked.

"(o.o) You've been hanging around Jou too much, haven't you, Kaiba?"

"(sweat drop)..."

"Hahaha," Meowth put his hands on his hips, "you don't got nothing on us in Pokémon!"

" ' You don't got nothing'...?" They repeated, blinking. Meowth sweat dropped and cleared his throat.

"Hey, I dought dat you were with Team Rocket?" Jou asked, having recovered from Kaiba's punch.

"Yeah, well...Jesse and James kept keepin' me up all night so I was never able ta sleep..." Meowth explained, glancing to the side. "And den they wouldn't even listen to my plans ta capture Pikachu!"

"Pika-what?" The yami's repeated, looking at him blankly.

"Pikachu," Meowth elaborated. "Ya know...da lightnin'-type Pokémon? Ash's _friend_? Eh?" Marik, Malik, Bakura, and Yami exchanged glances, then looked at Meowth again, blank expressions on their faces. "(sweat drop) Neva-mind. Ya obviously have nutin in dat head of yours."

"Hey, Kaiba," Anzu whispered, "this would be a good time to completely fix that thing of yours before – "

"GAHH!" Yuugi pointed to the sky. "IT'S A DRAGON!"

"No it's not, chap," Ryou disagreed. "It's more like a...bird."

"Nah, it's a dragon, I'm pretty sure."

"No, it's a bird, mate."

"It's a dragon, Ryou."

"No...It's a bird."

"Dragon."

"Bird."

"Dragon."

"Bird."

"Dragon."

"Bird!"

"IT'S DRAGON!"

"It's a BIRD!"

"Actually, it's Charzard," Meowth interrupted, idly standing by. They looked to him and linked. "And he looks hungry, so...See ya!" He hastily left as Charzard swooped down on them and took both Ryou and Yuugi by the collars of their shirts.

"AWW, HELP US!"

Everyone watched as Charzard flew to the mountains.

"Say..." Yami glanced around. "Where did Yuugi go?"

(-.-)

X

Kaiba stayed in the back as they walked towards the mountain where Charzard had taken Yuugi and Ryou. Shizuka fell back and beamed at Kaiba, who just stared at her. "Who the hell are you?" He asked, frowning. He put his contraption in his pocket, not trusting Shizuka Katsuya. _She'll probably try playing with it,_ he thought to himself, feeling protective of the object in his coat pocket.

"I'm Jou's sister, Kaiba," she told him, looking puzzled. "You know that, silly!" She swiped at his shoulder playfully. He blinked and took out a disinfectant wipe, wiping his shoulder cautiously. Shizuka blinked as he hastened his pace so that he was in the front where Anzu and Yami were arguing.

"...if my abiou had been taken away _right in front of me_, I _think_ I would have done something, Anzu!" Yami told her irritably.

"Then why didn't you grab for him when Charzard snatched him and Ryou away?"

"Because that's not what happened!"

"Then what _did_ happen, Yami? I'm curious to know."

"...It's all a conspiracy," he told her. "The thing is...the thing is, Kaiba is paying Jou so that we go world from world so he can get laid by some alien woman!" Anzu's jaw dropped and she stared at Yami, just like Kaiba was (though he looked more murderous.) "Yup." Yami nodded, satisfied with his lie.

"Ahem...Even if that was or is the case, Yami, you didn't answer my question: what happened to Yuugi and Ryou?"

"Kaiba paid them to run away."

"(-.-) I am so sure that's what happened," she grumbled sarcastically.

X

"Yuugi..." Ryou said uncertainly, glancing around. "I don't think he's going to eat us."

"(OO)...I don't think he is, either, Ryou."

"So, um...Should we run and hide or...endure this sight much longer?" He asked, watching as the male Charzard's danced around, making grunting sounds.

"(X.X) This is too much for my innocent mind, Ryou!" Yuugi squeaked.

"Then it's decided! We run for it!" However, as they ran down the mountain, Ryou tripped and Yuugi slammed into his back, which made the two roll down the mountain. They slammed into a tree at the bottom and laid on the ground for a long time, saying nothing. "...I'm glad that my father has State Farm Insurance."

"That's car insurance, Ryou," Yuugi said in a whiny voice.

"Well...we have some other kind of insurance, too," Ryou told him a bit uncertainly.

"(X.X) We're gonna dieeee!"

X

"...and the guy said, that's not a taco, that's my wife!" Honda told Mai, Shizuka, Otogi, Malik, Marik, and Bakura, who just stared at him.

"I'm not completely sure that understand this joke," Mai slowly said, Shizuka nodding her head in agreement. The men of Honda's audience smirked.

"We do," they said, glancing at each other mischievously. Kaiba, who had overheard, rolled his eyes.

_Morons._

They stopped at the mountain and Yami took a deep breath, rolling his sleeves up. He hopped on the mountain slid down, falling on the ground. "...Does anyone have a ladder?" He asked. A groan came from the side and they turned to see two beaten up abious. "(O.O) Yuugi!" Yami hurried to him and sniffed. "Don't worry, I will avenge your death!"

"(-.-) I'm not _dead_, Yami, no matter how much you want me to be..."

Kaiba took that time to work on his object. Shizuka, however, was watching him. She blinked and saw the shiny red button. Her pupils went big and a goofy grin spread on her face before she ran up to Kaiba. _Hmm, I have a bad feeling,_ Kaiba thought to himself and turned only to be knocked over by Shizuka, who slammed the palm of her hand on the button, screeching, "SHINY RED BUUTTOONN!"

Flash!

X

Kaiba threw Shizuka off him, glaring at her. He looked around and seeing that they were in a forest (and there was better animation) he wondered suspiciously which show they had been thrown in by the idiotic female. Anzu stormed over to him and glared. "Where are we, Kaiba?"

"(-.-) Gee, I dunno Mazaki, maybe we're in the land of the Pixie Fairies or La-La Land?" She frowned at him, then glanced around.

"Oh my frickin' gosh!" Honda and Otogi squealed at the same time. "WE'RE IN FUEDAL JAPAN!"

(oO)

"INUYASHA, EEK!" They hugged each other like fan girls. "Do you think we'll get to see Kagome, Sango, or Kikyo _nude_?"

"(OO)" At the mention of women being naked, Yuugi had a nosebleed, dirty thoughts coming to his head. And since Yami was completely oblivious, he could see Yuugi's thoughts.

"_Yuugi_!" The Pharaoh scolded, eyes widening. "How could you think such naughty thoughts?" The younger of the two blushed and hastily wiped his nose.

"Eh-heh-heh-heh..." Suddenly, they were all thrown to the ground as the Earth shook.

"OH-MY-GOSH!" Honda and Otogi shrieked again, clasping hands and giggling, "Inuyasha and Sesshomaru are fighting! AWW!"

"(oO) What the hell are those idiots doing?" Bakura muttered as they bounded off towards a clearing. Shrugging, the others followed.

"You aren't worthy of the Tetsuseiga," Sesshomaru told Inuyasha, flicking his Tokijin. Green light shot towards Inuyasha, who avoided it.

"It's a dream come true!" Honda and Otogi sighed, hugging each other once again. Bakura gave a look of disgust and something shot past him and grabbed both of Mai's hands. They all blinked at Miroku the Monk, who was staring at Mai soulfully.

"Will you be so kind as to...bear my children?" He asked Mai.

(O.O'')

SLAM!

"Er...or not?" Miroku muttered, Sango's Hiraikotsu on his head, a huge lump forming on his skull. Her brow twitched as she glared at the monk.

"Aii..." Yuugi held his head, swirls for eyes. "This is going so fast for me!"

_Going...fast...for him? (o.o) _Yami repeated in his head, bad thoughts springing to mind. _No! Naughty thoughts, naughty thoughts!_

"What's his problem?" Bakura asked Malik, glancing at Yami, who was banging his head against a tree trunk.

"INUYASHAINUYASHAINUYASHAINUYASHAINUYASHA!" Kagome screeched. Kaiba clamped his hands over his ears as she started up again, "INUUUYAASSSHAA! INUUUUYASSSHAA!"

_Does she never shut up? _Sesshomaru and Kaiba were both thinking. Finally, Inuyasha was down and Sesshomaru sheathed his Tokijin, but Kagome was currently...er, skipping like a CD...

"I-INU – I-INU – I-INU." Jaken went over and smacked her across the head. He was blown away as she screamed loudly, "INUYASHA!"

"Oh, SHUT UP ALREADY!" Bakura and Marik both roared. Kagome blinked and turned to them.

"Oh, hi! I'm Kagome Higurashi. Blah, blah, blah, blah, I'm the reincarnation of Kikyo, Inuyasha's past lover, blah, blah, blah – "

(sweat drop)

"Stupid female," both Sesshomaru and Kaiba muttered. Kaiba blinked and he turned to Sesshomaru, who was glaring at him (then again, he seemed to be glaring at everyone and every_thing_.) Inuyasha stood up and sweat dropped as the two stared at each other. Rin skipped next to Sesshomaru and blinked, looking at Kaiba, then looked her master.

"Um...Is it just me...or...?" Sango looked to Kagome, who was still talking about her life and how she had ended up in the Feudal Era and where the story was so far. "Okay, never mind."

"Humph," Sesshomaru snorted and turned away, going ahead. Rin followed, holding onto Ah-Un's reins.

"Wait for me, milord!" Jaken cried, stumbling after them. When Sesshomaru was gone (with Kaiba staring daggers after him,) Inuyasha went up to the newcomers.

"Hey," Inuyasha eyed them, "you dress like the people in Kagome's world."

"OH MY GOSH!" Honda and Otogi shrieked, running over to Inuyasha, who stumbled back in surprise. "Is it – is it really Inuyasha?" They poked him and tugged on his ears before yelling, "EEK, IT IS! IT IS INUYASHA!" They hugged each other again, then hugged Inuyasha, whose eyes were popping out in shock. "Ahh...This has always been my dream! Hey, you smell good, Inuyasha..."

"(O.O) Uh...thanks? I think..."

"Inuyasha, there's something wrong with Kagome again," Shippo called. "She won't shut up."

"Oh, just press the off button on her and she'll be normal again."

"Oh, okay." Shippo pressed her nose and she blinked, turning to them.

"What happened?" Kagome asked

"You went all weird again."

"(sweat drop) Again? Gee, this is happening more and more often!"

"(-.-) Yeah...We know."

"(o.o) Kaiba," Anzu poked his shoulder and he raised an eyebrow. "Hurry up and fix that thing! Honda and Otogi are going insane over Inuyasha. I'm starting to wonder whether that might actually do something to him..." Both Kaiba and Anzu looked to where Honda and Otogi were sniffing Inuyasha's hair.

"Fine...But where's the mutt?"

KABOOM!

Jou came flying from where Sesshomaru had left and that means only one thing...

"(X.X) Ow. All I asked was whether you had any Rin Soup or not!" Jou called, then rubbed his butt. "Geez. People has serious attitude problems around here..." He muttered.

"RED SHINY BUTTON!"

"No, don't you dare – " But it was too late. Shizuka had, once again, slammed her hand on the 'red shiny button.' She was just as stupid as her brother. _It must run in the family, _Kaiba concluded.

X

When they woke up, they were staring at...

X

DIS: Mwahaha, you'll never believe the twist I've put in this story! Hehehe...HAHAHA!

Kaiba: (o.o)...She's worse than Mokuba when he's sugar high.

DIS: (smiles sweetly) Please review and tell me any shows you might like them thrown in – provided I know the shows. Ciao!


	4. House MD

DIS: Eep, I'm sorry! Thanks to everyone who reviewed. Now I must hurry, hurry, hurry! Eep!

X

_Chapter Four, House M.D._

"Dude..." Honda said, staring at the hospital. "This is like..._ER!_"

"Fool," Bakura ground out, slapping him across the head and then yelping when Honda's hair stabbed him in the hand. He held up his hand and everyone gawked at the blood from the jab of Honda Hiroto's hair. He looked wildly at Honda, who appeared oblivious. You could almost see the question marks floating around his head. Jounouchi was appearing just as clueless. No wonder they were best friends.

"Uh, here Bakura..." Anzu handed him her handkerchief and he snatched it, wrapping it around his hand while glaring at Honda mutinously. When he turned around, he met the death glare of Seto Kaiba. Bakura sweat dropped and cleared his throat, turning from him.

_What a freak, _Bakura thought to himself. "As I was saying before you impaled me, you filthy son-of-a-bitch," Bakura spoke, glaring at Honda, whose eyes widened, "this isn't _ER_. In that show, there's sluts as far as the eye can see."

"(-.-) Bakura..." Ryou sighed, shaking his head. Bakura didn't even look at him.

"This is the show where the biggest jackass of all jackasses is! This is – "

Thok.

"You're in the way," Gregory House announced after having whapped Bakura over the head with his cane. Bakura glanced at him and then smirked.

"House M.D.," Bakura finished with a voice of bravado. He received blank looks at first, then Yami gave a squeal, his face lighting up. Malik and Marik slowly got expressions like Bakura's. Yuugi was still looking blank and the females were glaring at House.

"Don't you understand English?" House asked, giving one of his famous I'm-a-bastard-and-I-love-it looks. "Get out of the way."

"Yes," Anzu sneered sarcastically, "let the jackass of a cripple through."

(sweat drop)

House hardly even glanced at her as he limped away. Everyone watched him before Jou and Honda high-fived.

"Alright, man!" Honda said. "Let's go find some hot nurses to – "

"HONDA HIROTO!" Mai and Anzu bellowed, slapping him in unison. He yelped, rubbing his face.

"OW! What was that for?..."

"Aw, fuggedaboudit," Jou grumbled, waving a hand at them and grabbing his friend's arm. "Dose girls don't understand nothin'!" The two males loped off with the others staring after them.

"Where'd Jounouchi go?" Shizuka questioned in total befuddlement.

"(-.-) Stupid woman," Bakura grumbled. "She should be a blonde."

"HEY!" Mai bellowed. "Why don't you say that to my face?" Bakura rolled his eyes.

"I'm not interested in big-breasted bimbos," he replied. He grabbed his two companions' shoulders (aka Malik and Marik) and shoved them forward, calling, "We'll be back!"

"I guess we're splitting up," Anzu said, rubbing her arm. "I suppose – " Yami grabbed her arm, beaming.

"Let's get going, Anzu. We can spend some quality time together! Because that's what...what...what friends do." He gave her another bright-faced look.

"Oh! Okay, Yami. But we spend time all the time..."

"Not enough time for...for...for friends." He beamed again and she beamed back at him, though uncertain. As they walked away, Yami turned and smirked smugly at Kaiba, who was seething.

"I'll come along," Kaiba ground out.

"Okay," Anzu answered while Yami gave him the finger behind her back. Kaiba sneered at him in return.

"(o.o) I'll just sit here," Yuugi decided, plopping on a bench where Ryou was slumped.

"Okay, old chap. I'm too tired to go anywhere, anyways."

"Can we braid your hair?" Shizuka asked, pointing to her and Mai. Otogi was over at a desk, flirting with a nurse. Why was that not surprising?

X

Bakura, Malik, and Marik wandered around the hospital aimlessly and then paused, seeing an empty rolling bed. Each of them looked at each other and a mischievous smirk appeared on their devilishly handsome features. While Malik and Marik climbed onto the bed, Bakura peered in the room. Two nurses were picking up a dead guy. Ah, well, fun came first in Bakura's opinion. "Ready, boys?" He questioned, grabbing the end of the bed.

"Ready when you are!" They answered. Bakura pushed forward and soon, the three of them were zooming through the hospital, cackling and wrecking havoc...as usual. Malik and Marik had gotten two poles from IV carriers and were smacking people, knocking them down as they went past.

"GET BACK HERE!" A doctor screamed from behind them, racing after them. "GODDAMN JAPANESE!"

"WE'RE EGYPTIAN, YOU ASS!" The three bellowed back. He let out a string of curses and picked up his speed.

"Come on, Bakura, put some power into it!" Marik griped. "He's closing in on us."

"Aw, bite me, surfer boy," Bakura grumbled and picked up his speed. "HOLD THAT DOOR OPEN!" He roared at a nurse that was coming from the steps. Of course, they didn't know it was to the steps. Bakura leapt on as they headed towards the door. "Hey...Wait a minute...Aw, SHIIIITTT!"

"AWWWW!" Malik and Marik grabbed each other as they went careening down the steps with the doctor stumbling behind them.

"EEEEKKK!" The three turned to see a nurse being dragged by the tail of her skirt.

"She's slowing us down!" Malik growled. He took the dagger from his M. Rod and cut her off and throwing her at their pursuing doctor. "YEAH! Score!" He high-fived with the other two and then when they turned back, all three let out a shrill howl, seeing a group of amateur doctors crowded at the bottom of the stairs. The doctors let out screams of fright and jumped out of the way while the bed was flung into the air and twisted around, throwing the three from it. The bed crashed through a window.

As for the three Egyptians, they stumbled to their feet and when everyone looked at them, they ran like hell from the scene of the crime.

X

Kaiba fiddled around with his whatchamakalit as Yami chattered about useless things. Anzu responded to Yami when necessary, but was mostly watching Kaiba try to fix the stupid thing that the Katsuyas had unwittingly (ha!) broken who-knew how many times. "Say, Kaiba," Anzu spoke up when Yami finally went silent. "How long until that thing's fixed?" He shrugged.

"As long as I'm away from Jounouchi and his ditz of a sister, then it shouldn't take too long." She nodded.

"Okay."

(Silence)

"Say, Kaiba," she said again.

"What now, Mazaki?"

"How long until you fix _me?_"

(O.O)...

"Uh, what?" Kaiba finally brought his attention to her face and they stared at each other for a minute before Anzu laughed and waved a hand dismissively.

"Joking! Just trying to see whether you were paying attention or not." She began humming and walked ahead of the two males with both of them staring after her in bewilderment. Yami suspiciously looked at Kaiba.

"What kind of hints have you been throwing at Anzu?" Yami growled, leaning forward as he lowered his voice.

"None," Kaiba snapped back in a low voice. "And she said she was kidding."

"(-.-) For someone with a head as big as yours, you're pretty stupid."

"I thought you had the hots for her anyway?"

"I do." Pause. "But it's obvious she's got the hots for _you_, you son of two whoring bitches."

"You know what? Shut the hell up! I'm sick of your idiocy!"

"_My _idiocy?!" Yami repeated.

_They're both idiots, _Anzu thought, rolling her eyes, hearing their raised voices. She paused, seeing House walking towards them. An evil grin spread across her lips and she crept forward and kicked his cane so he stumbled. He stared at her in some surprise and she batted her eyelashes innocently at him. "Oops," she said sweetly. "My foot slipped." His face crinkled in a frown and he backed away from her, limping away. "YOU SHOULD JUST ADMIT THAT CAMERON LOVES YOU!" She called angrily. She humphed, crossing her arms across her chest. _And you, Anzu Mazaki, should admit you like Kaiba. _She turned to watch Kaiba and Yami scream at each other and smiled despite herself at Kaiba's furious blue eyes. Her smile dropped when she realized what she was doing and she let out angry sound, beating herself across the head. _Bad, bad, bad!_

"Heyyy, Mazaki!" An exotic voice slurred. She jumped, turning to see Malik and his two evil compadres. "What're the fag boys yelling about?"

"Hey!" Anzu protested. "They're not gay! Especially Kaiba!" Malik raised his eyebrows. "In fact, I bet if I flashed him, he'd be drooling like no tomorrow! Him _and_ Yami!" Malik exchanged a look with the other two, who looked very interested. Gee, I wonder why?

"Well, let's make a bet, Mazaki," he suggested with a smirk. "I bet you ten bucks that he'll be indifferent."

"Deal!" Anzu decided, nodding. The three of them inched forward so they could get a good look, too. "Both of you shut up!" She snapped at Kaiba and Yami. They shut up and looked at her just as she raised her shirt to, well, flash them. Yami fainted and Kaiba just...stood there, staring. He dropped his gadget thing and his face turned red. She smirked and dropped her shirt, turning to look at Malik...whose face was also red.

"Uh..." He gurgled. He ducked his head, muttering, "Right, you win, you win." Then he hurried away, mumbling, "Bathroom, bathroom," to himself. Bakura and Marik had bright faces and were grinning from ear to ear.

"Perverts," she muttered to them. They snickered and then went over to Yami, kicking him awake. Kaiba glanced down at his gadget and picked it up, staring at it uncomprehendingly for a moment. He slowly shook his head, his face returning to its normal color. He was having a hard time believing that Anzu had just done that. Not that it was a bad image... A sound erupted from his throat as said image floated up to his mind's eye. "Let's go sit somewhere so that Kaiba can fix that stupid thing," Anzu suggested, acting as though nothing had just happened.

"...Fix _you_..." Kaiba mumbled to himself, slumping in a chair and immediately engaging himself in fixing his thing-a-majig.

X

"You don't got nothing in your skull!" Jou announced with a snicker. They were currently MRI-ing each other. What numbskulls.

"Na-uh!" Honda answered.

"Yeah, seriously, man."

"You're lying, Jou!"

"Hell if I am!"

"Hell if you're not!"

"What," a growl came from behind Jou, "do you think you're doing?" Jou jumped and turned to see Dr. Forman glaring at him.

"Hey, don't be hatin'."

"I'm not a gangster – even if I _am_ black," the latter snapped.

"(o.o) Chill. I was just having some fun – "

"Get out! You _and_ your brainless friend!"

"Ha! Told ya!" Jou smugly said to Honda as he climbed off the MRI.

"Whatever. You probably bribed him to say that."

"Did not."

"Did too!"

Forman sighed, rubbing his temples. _Idiots. _

X

Jou and Honda continued through the hospital when they saw policeman examining where the three crazy Egyptians' bed had crashed through the window. "...this man with crazy blonde hair that stuck up and another one that looked almost like him and..." The two blinked at the nurse's words and exchanged nervous looks.

"Um, you don't dink dey're talking about Malik and Marik, do you?" Jou asked anxiously.

"Uh, duh! Hell yeah I do. Who else has crazy hair and an almost-twin?"

"(o.o) Point taken. Let's go find da others, den!"

"Yeah!" They quickly hurried away to find their friends.

X

Kaiba glanced up as the rest of their entourage came up. Honda and Jou were panting and looking more like dogs than usual. He had finally finished the gadget and had it tucked safely inside his pants – in a place where not even Shizuka Katsuya would put her hand. That is, if she was as innocent as she acted. In any case, he was ready to leave and intend on leaving as soon as everyone shut up.

"EVERYONE SHUT UP!" Anzu bellowed over the voices. There group went quiet and the doctors and nurses gave her strange looks. She gave a sweet smile, saying, "Kaiba has an announcement." She turned to Kaiba, smiling. He cleared his throat.

"When the clock hits one o'clock, then we're good to go. That's the time set on the device." He paused, glaring at them. "So I want everyone one of you geeks to stay here unless you want your ass kicked by me."

"But Kaiba – " Jou began anxiously.

"Shut up, Katsuya!"

"But there's cops looking for Malik and Marik," Honda spoke up nervously. "What do we do if they try to arrest us?"

"COPS?" Everyone turned to glare suspiciously at the three Egyptians who feigned innocence.

"Aw, come on," Malik whined. "We had to have _some_ fun!"

"Couldn't you have done it so the police _wouldn't _be after us?" Anzu demanded exasperatedly. Malik blinked and turned to look at her. Slowly, color rose to his face and he cleared his throat nervously, looking away, ignoring her question. She sweat dropped, as well as Bakura and Marik.

_It's going to take awhile for him to look her in the eye, _Bakura and Marik thought with wry amusement.

"We have less than five minutes," Kaiba said levelly, ignoring the interaction between Malik and Anzu with some difficulty. "They're not going – "

"That's them, officer!" A nurse screeched, pointing at Malik, Marik, and Bakura. "Those are the men!" The cops started towards them.

"(-.-) Thanks, Kaiba," Marik sarcastically said. "You just jinxed us."

"Oh, shut up," Kaiba grumbled. "Hurry and haul ass! But stay together, dammit, because when it turns one..." He trailed off as they started running from the cops.

"Jou, Shizuka, both of you stay away from Kaiba!" Anzu warned, glaring at the Katsuyas. "I want to go home, dammit!"

"(o.o) Huh?" Both Katsuyas intoned, looking utterly blank.

"Two minutes!" Kaiba called.

"We have to go around running for two minutes?" Yami gasped out. "Well, that's just shit!"

"I'm going to be sweaty after this!" Otogi angrily said. "That's so gross!"

"My makeup will run!" Mai cried.

"Shut the hell up!" Kaiba snapped. "One minute!"

"Gah! Dey're gaining on us!" Jou announced. Kaiba swung around and grabbed one of the doctors, throwing it at the cops, who stumbled. They carefully pushed the doctor out of the way and pursued.

"I got it!" Bakura cried, his face lighting up. He saw a bed with a sick person on it and let out a cackle, grabbing it and flinging it down at the cops, knocking them over, making them careen backwards. Marik and Malik cackled with Bakura, high-fiving with him.

"Alright, it's time!" Kaiba yelled at them. Everyone slowed down and he brought out the gadget, turning the knob and then slamming his hand on the button as nurses and doctors started towards them angrily. There was a flash and then they were in the living room of Yuugi Mutou's house. _That 70's Show _was still on, at the same part it had been on when they left.

"Oh, glory!" Yuugi and Ryou yelled jubilantly. "We're home!"

"It seemed like days that we were gone," Yami musingly said, "but it must have only been a few seconds." Kaiba nodded and then threw his gadget on the floor, stomping on it and crushing it to itsy bitsy pieces.

"Good riddance," he growled.

"Aww," Anzu cooed, grinning. "You're too smart for your own good, Kaiba!" She glomped him suddenly, knocking him to the ground. "But that's why I like you so much!"

"Noooo!" Yami howled in despair. "Not Kaiba!"

"Lucky bastard," Malik muttered beneath his breath, sulkily kicking at the ground, pouting as Anzu rained kissed on Kaiba's face.

"Well," Kaiba managed out, "I suppose I'll give you a try, Mazaki..."

"Pff," Bakura snorted. "Don't be so prideful. You want her and you know it." Kaiba glared at him.

Grroowwlll.

(o.o)

"I'm so hungry," everyone moaned.

_Fin!_

X

DIS: (x.x) Man was that a sucky ending or what? Whatever! As long as I got the stupid thing done. Well, this is the end of _You Stupid Mutt! _Please review on your way out! Ciao!


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